One of my firearms instructors was being kind of a smart ass, told me to shoot the black dot and put both shots in the same hole. So I did… And then I did it again with two more shots.
So if all else fails I’m just going to give up being a cop and be a professional bullseye shooter.
I feel like such a shitty girlfriend/wife/domestic partner… Whatever I am. My boyfriend’s birthday is today and I’ve been so busy with work and school I spaced it and didn’t buy or make him anything.
He told me not worry about it, that he’s perfectly happy spending time with family, which we’re having dinner with his parents tonight. But still…
I guess it’s mostly that I’m mad at myself for not realizing it was his birthday already, until the other day when he told me we’d be having dinner with his parents.
Month 1: I would tear out the rest of my organs and offer them to you just to finish the collection you started when you walked away with my butchered heart if that would bring you back.
Month 2: When you left you promised me that it would get better. But I can’t think of a single promise you didn’t break, so I’m not sure I really believe you.
Month 3: I’ve almost completely forgotten the sound of your voice. The only words I can still hear you say are “I love you,” and it’s driving me insane.
Month 4: I’m back in the city where we met for the first time and I’m a nervous wreck. I’m constantly terrified and hopeful that we’ll get a second chance meeting.
Month 5: A year ago we’d lie awake on the phone on opposite sides of the country just listening to each other breathe. Now I lie awake wondering how I could’ve cared so much.
Month 6: I could’ve said yes to so many people since the day you left. But right now being alone is a hell of a lot easier than the thought of trying to hold an unfamiliar hand.
Month 7: Everyone around me has completely forgotten how deeply you cut me. Only I can see how slow wounds to the memory are to fade, but also how tough the scar tissue has made me and my heart."
Muscle is created by repeatedly lifting things that have been designed to weigh us down. So when your shoulders feel heavy, stand up straight and lift your chin – call it exercise. When the world crumbles around you, you have to look at the wreckage and then build a new one out of all the pieces that are still here. Remember, you are still here.
The human heart beats approximately four thousand times per hour. Each pulse, each throb, each palpitation is a trophy engraved with the words ‘You are still alive.’
You are still alive.
Act like it."